That I was superwoman.

I used 2 think that I was superwoman, 

that I could do it all:

• Work as a behaviour interventionist for kids with autism

• Support, advocate and fundraise for families.

• Run a home-based business.

• Survive being married and divorced before 25, then settle down for "Take 2" before turning 30.

• Finish my degree.

• Travel the globe.

• Be a painter/artist/writer

• Have time to enjoy life, spending it with family and great friends.

Then in 2008 I added:

• Foster a young child with autism.

And for a while I thought I could be superwoman.

Maybe some people think that I am.

But by my standards I've failed. 

Please don't try to cheer me up by arguing this.

When I started fostering I thought I knew what I was getting in to. 

After all I'd:

• grown up with a sister who has special needs.

• worked since 2000 in families' homes, teaching skills to their children with autism.

• seen kids make great gains with intervention.

• done weekend respite for years, even with several children.

• seen challenging behaviours and tough situations.

So it wouldn't be that much different, right? Right!?!

I use to think that I was superwoman, that I could do it all..

And then along came a boy who has taught me about the world, about others, about myself.

If I had known that I couldn't be the iconic figure would I have chosen to foster?

Would any parent choose to have children if they knew the challenges ahead?

Most parents chose to be parents, but the part about their child having autism (or any special needs) gets thrown in.

For parents there is no choice, not really.

I knew this child had autism, and yet still I chose…

But my heart tells me that's not how it was.

It wasn't really a choice.

I saw a boy who needed help, and so I stepped forward.

I didn't choose.

He, this life, it chose me.

So now I've leaned that if I'm going to be anything close to superwoman, I better modify my list! I can't do it all perfectly, but I can do a few things well.

This realization and acceptance leaves me in a reflective place. I decided to share this because, well, selfishly it's therapeutic. And perhaps as I share my realizations, you may gleam something about the world of autism, parenting children with special needs, or being a behaviour interventionist. Or perhaps you know me, and are curious to read about your part in all of this!